Virtue-Based Leadership - Much More Than Touchy-Feely

The Pitfalls of Emotion-Centric Leadership

Many people have a negative reaction to the adjective “touchy-feely” when referring to a leadership approach. It depends on definitions, of course. If the term refers to an approach that includes hugging and touching, that is problematic.  If the term is used to mean an approach to leadership that focuses only on meeting the emotional needs of others while neglecting the noble purpose (the why) of the team, it could lead to exhaustion, burnout, and poor results, and is also problematic. If the term implies using a soft approach without accountability and high standards - without trustworthy feedback, once again it is problematic.

‍The True Meaning of "Touchy-Feely" Leadership

If touchy-feely means leading with high self-awareness, vulnerability, and emotional intelligence it is probably an appropriate adjective, but still not the most complete. At Severn Leadership Group, we promote Virtue-Based leadership- which is the focus of our founder, Sig Berg’s, new book, The Virtue Proposition. Five Virtues That Will Transform Leadership, Team Performance, and You. The book suggests a leadership approach that is driven by the five virtues of love, integrity, truth, excellence, and relationships all enabled by courage. The approach suggests that soft people skills are important but not a “be-all-end-all” approach to leadership – just as a “rational only”, “performance-metrics only” approach to leadership is unbalanced and ignores the reality of the vital emotional intelligence needed in leading and decision-making. 

‍Embracing Virtue-Based Leadership

As opposed to a touchy-feely approach to leadership, Virtue-based leadership includes combining the high standards of excellence, and the tough love of truth and integrity and balances these with the emotional intelligence involved with love and relationships. Enabling our leadership with the sword of courage is certainly a stronger image than “touchy-feely” provides. Embedded in the “how” of virtue-based leading are the actions of building trust and giving and receiving appropriate feedback which involve combinations of emotional sensitivity and vulnerability for sure. But these actions also involve the directness of telling it like it is and being honest with our teams. Virtue-based leadership requires vulnerability but not weakness.

Conclusion

So, is “touchy-feely” a negative term when describing leadership? Yes and no. I submit that “Virtue-Based leadership” is a more comprehensive way to describe the best leadership approach. What do you think?

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Bruce Engelhardt is the President of Flagship Coaching LLC where he uses his passion for teaching, mentoring, and coaching to enable executives to get results. He serves at Severn Leadership Group on the board of directors and as a mentor. Bruce has 35+ years of experience in executive leadership, engineering operations, and finance. He is a lifelong learner with a solid background in leading in technology, financial services, government, and not-for-profit.

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